@7/'93 I learn from my daughter's employer, my friend, that KK is making my daughter's wedding dress. My daughter is planning to have KK participate in all of the wedding.  I research the etiquette, write KK, and cc all involved, that KK will not be at the rehearsal dinner, will not be in the bride's room, will not be in the parent's pew (she'll be sitting 3 pews back - my boyfriend didn't expect to sit in the parent's pew even if he was catering the entire affair on his own - doing all the cooking and serving in order to impress me. It worked. I'm now married to him.), and she will not be in the receiving line.

At the wedding KK honors my boundaries. I run into her in the hallway after the wedding, but before the reception. I complimented her on the beautiful wedding dress and other things she'd made.

I guess she couldn't stand it anymore. When it came time to dance with the groom she locks eyes with me from her reception table to mine as she walks across the room to dance with my new son-in-law, locks eyes with me over his shoulder as they dance, and as she unzips his fly and stuffs in $1. It's on the wedding video.

Cheryl

 

1997 I'm dealing with a lump in my breast. My ex and KK  are now regular churchgoers.  They take our young daughters to deliver First Communion whenever they're down there on visitation.

My ex writes me a note that he'll be praying for me. I returned his note with these words on it, "An apology for the shabby way you and your girlfriend treated me would mean something. This is a phony substitute."

Cheryl                        

@ '96 My ex and his girlfriend were disgusted with the clothes the girls wore. It didn't go along with their Town & Country lifestyle.  They tried to get me to buy the girls a wardrobe that would fit their lifestyle because, after all, now he was paying $896 a month in child support. I didn't.

So one visit, they buy the girls church dresses, and refused to allow the girls to take the clothes to my home cuz "She doesn't know how to take care of good clothing."

By the time my ex exercised another visitation, the clothes didn't fit the girls.  They didn't buy them clothes again.

summer '96 I think my ex and his girlfriend were feeling like so much better parents than I, and they didn't want to pay child support, so they tried several times to get the girls to live with them.  The first time I was with my husband in Planet Hollywood Vegas, the girls in CA with their dad, when my cell phone rang. My ex, feigning a little surprise, said, "I think Angela wants to live with us but I thought I should ask you first." I LOL!!!.  My ex, taken aback, said, "What are you laughing about?" I chuckled, "Nothing. Go ahead and ask her. She's nearly 12 years old. She has a say in where she lives." I hung up.  It wasn't til then that a growing terror came over me - what if she said yes.

I needn't have worried. Each time my ex thought our girls would want to live with him, and he asked, they nicely turned him down.

Cheryl