'98 I learned that tho KK was a very sexual flirt , she didn't like sex.
She wouldn't "sleep" with a married man. Sex supposedly didn't begin til after he left me for good 6/91. *shaking my head* When he left me he said one of the reasons was cuz he wanted a woman who wanted sex all the time. We'd been married 20 years before the divorce was final. I'd had a lot of fun and enjoyed our sex life. But now he saw it different. He said he'd only married me cuz I was pregnant. I don't think you stay married and have 3 more kids just cuz I'm pregnant before marriage.
I later read somewhere that men "rewrite" history in their minds to justify crazy behavior.
He'd rented a room from his best friend's exgirlfriend, KK, and had fallen in love with her.
Once he left me for good to live with KK, they continued to sleep in separate bedrooms. I get the impression she'd been very comfortable with my ex's longing for her, but didn't really want a relationship with him. She kicked him out a few months later cuz she was still pining away for my ex's best friend. A year later my ex's best friend up and marries a new woman in his life. KK's shocked. For some years she'd been hoping he'd marry her some day. She invites my ex back into her home. They continue to sleep in separate bedrooms. Now they were both pining away for the best friend who was out of their lives.
A week after his 4/98 email I learn he'd proposed to KK 5 times over the 7 years and was rejected each time.
A week after leaving KK, he proposed to Rose, a single mom with 4 kids the same age range as our own 4 kids. She doesn't have custody of her children, and they live in TX while she lives in CA.
My ex had been having an affair with his co-worker Rose for a couple of months while living with KK.
KK is mortified and can't believe he's in his right mind. For KK it hadn't been "in process for awhile" as he put it.
I'd been appropriate all this time for the kids' sake. My turn.
I wrote KK, "What goes around comes around. You fool with a married man, help destroy a 20 year marriage and wreak havok on a family, then he fools around on you with Becky when you're first living together, and leaves to marry Rose years later. You're such an idiot."
Later KK's having a breakdown realizing she'd believed my ex's lies about me and our marriage. She was lamenting to my son about his dad having an affair on her, and leaving her, "This is what Cheryl went thru!" My son pointed out to her that she'd had an affair with his dad while he was married to me.
KK's still a lonely alcoholic. I'm happily remarried :-D .
universe may not always play fair, but at least it's got a hell of a sense of
Sex and the City
"The mark of a whole person is not wealth nor perfection. The mark is their ruthless resistance to staying stuck, to being predictable, to building a shallow life by denying the life within, by an endless conformity to what society wants. A whole person is not anything - other than themselves. The whole person is not driven to convert others, or save others or rescue others. The whole person is focused on living brightly, immediately, with movement, with passion, with fire - fire between the ears, fire up the spine, fire in the belly and fire, especially, in the heart." Wayne C Allen