At
her home, bm complains how cruel I am to keep her from the
cat.
I
make sure that the cat is in my bedroom every time they come to pick up
ss. I make sure ss has all the items his mother usually asks for,
I insist his stuff be outside the door at 8:20am, for her earliest
arrival at 8:30am.
I explain to ss that we don't intrude at their home,
and they won't be allowed to intrude at our home.
I
explain he must close the door behind
him if he has to come back into the house. He is always ready, sitting
by the glass door watching for her, ready to leave.
At
a later conversation, I mention with a smirk watching grandpa's nose at
our glass door snooping. Ss tells them at his next visit.
I notice
that grandpa accompanies bm once again to pick up ss, but stays far away
from our sliding glass door, pacing back and forth on the long
balcony in front of our and other townhouses. My girls and their
friends are staring at him out of their upstairs window. Grandpa doesn't
accompany bm again.
It
begins to have an effect on how things go.
When grandma picked up
ss for bm, grandma didn't come to the door, stood at the wall waiting
for ss to notice her thru the glass door.
Bm now stands away from the doors, and makes a point of not looking
into our home.
It
begins to have an effect for dh picking up ss at their
home. They used to try to keep dh waiting, and confront, bully or manipulate him regarding issues while he's picking
up ss. They
learned dh will not address issues while picking up ss.
Dh now pulls his
car into their driveway and waits for ss. Ss's out in a couple of
minutes.
The last time I went with dh, we pulled into the driveway. Grandpa, as usual, is
trying to look nonchalant strolling thru the front yard, looking at his home,
stealing glances at our car and license plate. Dh can't see grandpa
looking our way without leaning forward. Dh stays put and I sit and stare calmly back at grandpa. He starts stirring,
uncomfortable. Finally ss comes out. Grandpa nonchalantly strolls around
the back of our car.
*shrug* No skin off our nose.
Concerned
stepmom
"She" can be one too!
When you look at the deadbeat sites, ask yourself if you're
behaving like a deadbeat, and remember that men are victims of "her"
deadbeat mentality also.
Whether you are a custodial parent, a non-custodial parent, a
first wife, a second wife, a girlfriend, a boyfriend, ask yourself if you're behaving in
the best interest of the child.
