Taking the High Road

"The road to truth is long, 

and lined the entire way 

with annoying bastards."

 

Alexander Jablokov, The Place of No Shadows

10/7/2000 "after almost 10 years of fighting w/ my ex trying to get him to pay support, get insurance, and visiting our two children, he finally meets and marries a woman he got pregnant. he actually got a job (selling cars ha ha ha is that perfect or what?) and let her stay home. i kept climbing up the money ladder trying to support me and our children and he finds out how much money i was actually making through my own stupidity: i was going to by a van off of him. 

anyway, we then go through a 7 mo. long custody battle before the court investigator finally believed my children about him doing drugs and gave us both a drug test. he failed. the court is now pissed at him, because not only did he fail a drug test but he decided that he was not going to visit the children for his hour long every sunday visit to harmony house because he was tired of being treated like a criminal. the last time he had a regular visit was Feb. 28th and the last time he saw them for an hour long visit was in May. he kept missing the visits that he was sched. to make April as well.

anyway it is now October and he is finally telling me how sorry he and his now wife are and if the courts will let him drop his case will i let him see them? of course i will, i say nicely. and i  mean it, my children miss him, they are angry w/ him, but they also love him and so i will let him see them.

BUT it is sooooo funny how agreeable he is now on the support, paying 1/2 the medical, school fees, and clothes. just send him copies of the receipts he says. and you know what? i have A LOT of receipts!! ha ha ha. funny how they will get to him long before the courts will let him see our children w/o lots of drug tests and counseling. but, of course, he does not realize this so after many many hours of court, counseling, and lots of money down the drain that i did not have i now feel vindicated. 

my children have had counseling for his wife's treatment of them, his treatment of them, and their drug use. my only hope about their drug use is that they limit it to the time when they do not have our children when my children do finally have to start visiting over there again. it is the only thing worrying me now. but, i do not have to face that one for awhile thank God. 

the stress and anger had taken it's toll on me and our children, but it is finally over and it has all ended for the best so far. things do end so to all you out there who are dealing w/ your ex's and their crap: hang on and know that things do get better in the end. good-luck and thank you for letting me get this out.

i believe my ex does love his children no matter what he has been like and i have a lot of hope for everyone's future now. thank you again and have a nice day."

--Lori

 

So What by Tammy Cochran

> Thanks! I'm glad I was able to contribute to this worthy site!

Thank you. There are people who don't agree. The site began as a tribute to an online woman friend. Her husband of many years was still living at home, openly having an affair, demanding she get a job altho the year earlier a car accident had smashed her arm, and the docs refused to allow her to work.

Her response was to play pranks on her live in ex.

As the site developed, I began to include the stories of my ex. I didn't play pranks on him, but things I call pranks happened to him because of his inappropriate behavior.

Then I wanted to make a point that deadbeats aren't about the sex of the ex.

So the site switches in between to bagging on women deadbeats (and the site becomes a prank itself on the women who came to the site expecting a male bashing site).

I just need to express myself - keeps me sane among crazy ex's of both sexes.

Cheryl

Take the pledge to get along with your ex.

"Divorce Story is based on a truly remarkable story of divorce. It takes you in great detail through the life of it's author and one of the most unusual divorce saga's ever encountered. The story is intended to entertain, but more importantly, to illustrate the misery and waste associated with divorce and custody battles. This story also proves that people can overcome even seemingly impossible adversity and stereotypes if they believe in themselves. Lastly, this story exemplifies the effects of protracted custody battles on the most innocent victims of all - the children. The actual case that this story is based upon is still active in court and has at the time of publishing generated 8 separate appeals to the California Appellate Court and one petition to the California Supreme Court. These appeals have resulted in two published decisions that have altered family law in California. One of the more remarkable facts regarding this case is that the author, who has no legal training, represented himself in both Superior and Appellate Court throughout the majority of this litigation - having a fool for a client, as many might say."

Soft Split - because breaking up is hard to do.